Love Life: The Pregnancy

So turns out I didn't blog throughout almost my entire pregnancy. And of those blogs very few were probably related to my pregnancy at all. You know that saying, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all..." Yeah, that may have applied here!

I am partly kidding, but this was the most difficult pregnancy I have had. And that is saying a lot because I wouldn't have considered my other pregnancies necessarily easy. Please, before I do a quick summary of the experience, know that I am not out to complain. I know above all that I am blessed beyond messure, but I want to give an accurant account of what happened, even if only for my own future reference.

I remember in the beginning of my pregnancy, especially through my first trimester, that I was dealing with really horrific headaches. I am not a big headache person so it was really new to me, and pretty darn awful! I saw an accupuncturist multiple times and after a few visits seemed to finally get the headaches under control. My doctor contributed them to the many hormonal changes that happen within the first tri-mester, but I remember feeling frustrated because they lasted well into my second trimester. Along with the headaches I also had times of real fatigue and weakness. I specifically remembering being at Panera one morning with the kids and having to pack up our food and get to the car as soon as possible because I was so worried I was going to pass out in public and I was very worried about the kids. I called Cole from the car and got a handle on everything before making my way home. I even had the Dr. test my blood because I remember just not feeling quite right. Everything with the blood work came back normal, which was good, but I never did have an explanation for why I wasn't feeling right.

At 20 weeks I went to the Dr. because I had started experiencing pain with the movement of my legs. The first symptoms I remember having were difficulty kicking off my shoes and rolling over in bed. There was just a lot of pain in my groin area with these movements. My Dr. originally told me it was just normal pains associated with having my third baby. I knew there was nothing normal about it and through my own research was able to see pretty quickly that I had something called Pubis Symphisis Dysfunction. Sounds fun, right?? No, not at all, actually. I immediately started seeing an amazing chiropractor who explained to me that the ligament that holds the pubic bone together was basically like a rubberband that no longer held its elasticity. This was a result of an overproduction of the hormone relaxin, and something that I had no control of. Because of this, my pubic bone was constantly pivoting and grinding on itself and on my nerves, eventually causing pain with any movements of my legs. This was so difficult to manage, especially while trying to take care of the other kiddos. The chiropractor was my only hope for pain management, and although I know it helped me from getting worse, she openly told me there was nothing I could do to fix it while still pregnant. I wore a pelvic brace to help give support, although truthfully I didn't find it very helpful. And, sadly, towards the end of the pregnancy Cole was wheelcharing me around if we were needing to walk long distances.

This was a very vulnerable and difficult time for me and the entire family. I felt like a spectator to my life becuase I was able to participate in very little. The kids and I stayed in the house the majority of the time because I couldnt' handle much else. Cole was such a big help, as was all of my family and friends, and I am also so proud of how well the kids managed this time. Tavian and Felicity both had an understanding of the pain that I was in and of my limitations, and were also so willing to accept the sacrifice for the new baby. This isn't to say it was easy on them, but they really stepped up to the plate and both were able to grow a lot and I think in many ways were much more prepared and ready for the addition of a new sibling!

Ok, I think that is the condenced jist of the situation throughout the pregnancy and leading up to Baby Beckett's arrival.